Random acts of kindness.
This afternoon I was driving home from Walmart. I turned the corner near my house and came upon a car being pushed by a man and steered by a woman. As I was approaching the car, the man jumped inside and I saw them both shake their heads. For those few seconds my mind ran wild with thoughts. Do I stop to help? Do I stay in my safe little box? Do I at least ask if I can do anything and hope they say no? Do I suck it up and follow my heart?
I pulled up beside them and rolled down my window. I asked them if they needed help. The woman asked the husband and she turned back to me to say that they just wanted to get it down the road and around the corner into a parking lot so they were out of the street. I told them I could help push and see how far we got. The husband reluctantly agreed. I parked my car on the side of the road and hopped out. I ran to the back of these strangers’ car and pushed along with the exhausted man. The wife stayed in the car to steer us, thanking me over and over. We dug our heels in and started to push with all our might. We grunted together as we got that heavy piece of metal down the road and to the corner. The corner was a little bit of a hill. We got stuck in our tracks and the wife jumped out to help us. We got it up and over and then the car began to glide with ease. The woman was able to coast into a parking spot. As I headed back to my car, the husband thanked me and offered me money. I watched as he took out some dollar bills from his pocket and started to contemplate how much would be appropriate for such a deed. I laughed quietly and said, “oh my gosh, no!” He pleaded for a moment and I said no with a smile. He shook my hand and said thank you. I wished him luck and got into my car.
As I drove home I thought about it all. I was out of breath and my arms burned from the whole ten minute process of pushing a car. (slightly pathetic LOL) I was happy and proud of myself. I hoped they were able to get their car fixed. I had been in that position so many times. No one ever stopped to help me. I was surprised at how many men drove past us and never once offered a hand. They looked, gawked and kept on going.
I wish the man didn’t feel the need to offer me money. I honestly hadn’t even thought of him doing that and was surprised. I suppose I would have done the same thing if someone had helped me. How many would expect the offer of money in return for kindness? But, why do we feel the need to offer money? What happened to the days of old when helping out your neighbor was part of your average day? When did the idea of being kind become something we had to remind ourselves about with the word “random” in front of it?
We are in a hurry, we are led by money. I am the poster child for the fear of putting oneself out there. We all have our issues and stresses. We get caught up in our own mess. But, despite that, we can’t lose sight of the person standing next to us. It’s okay to lend a hand. It’s okay to offer a smile.
I am so proud of you for stepping out of your box and helping those people. It's amazing how far you have come with your self work.
ReplyDeleteOn your other topics: I agree with you about helping others. It used to be the norm to help, without consideration of pay or any other gain other than a genuine thank you.
I will always remember the time that a friend and I were coming back from a camping trip and we saw an empty car on the side of the road just below the Climax mine outside Leadville. It is a desolate spot, nothing is out there. I remember thinking I wonder what happened to the person in the car. A few minutes later we spotted a man walking on the side of the highway carrying a gas can. I slowed down, and my friend Allen asked what I was doing. I said I was going to give the guy a ride to the gas station at the bottom of the hill, maybe 10 or 12 miles away. The guy was so happy that someone stopped and he couldn't have been more thankful. When we got to the gas station I let the guy out and he thanked me for the ride. I told him to fill his gas can and I would take him back up to his car. He couldn't believe that I was willing to go out of my way that much to help him. All I could think was I would hate to make him walk back UP the pass to his car. As soon as the guy went into the station, Allen turned to me and I saw that he was pissed off. He said now I'm going to miss the Bronco's kick-off. I was blown away, I couldn't believe that a fucking football game would be more important than helping this guy out. I mean I didn't think anything about giving up an extra 30 minutes of my life for a guy I didn't know. As it turns out the guy came out and said there was a man inside who was headed toward Leadville who would take him to his car. He thanked me again and left. We headed back to Denver and the whole way I hoped that Allen felt like a shithead for behaving like he did. I think about that day a lot even though it was 20+ years ago.
It is not that hard to help someone. I don't believe you have to be everything to people, nor do you have to help everyone, but sometimes it is good to do. Even though it sounds trite, the thanks from someone you have helped really are reward enough.
That's awesome Brenda! I agree with you. Sometimes I think that not only did you help the people by pushing that car, but you helped countless others that by example, the people who saw you push the car thought, "Hey, next time I see someone that needs a helping hand, I'm going to do the same thing."
ReplyDeleteIt's an amazing thing, paying it forward. It makes you feel good and at the same time, it contributes to the betterment of mankind. I know it sounds so friggin hokey but damnit, it's so friggin true. I love you, sistah!